Promise me

you will not spend
so much time
treading water
and trying to keep your
head above the waves 
that you forget,
truly forget,
how much you have always
loved to swim.
- tyler knott gregson

Hell no, I'm not that girl
I still wanna be the leader of the fucking free world
Yeah I'm a big dreamer
I'm a believer
Just try to tell me no, I'm a go full steamer
No, can't slow me down
I built this house from the inside out
Block by block from the bottom to the top
I know just who I is
And I know just who I'm not

Keep Your Head Up

And since we all came from a woman,

Got our name from a woman,

And our game from a woman,

I wonder why we take from our women?

Why we rape our women?

Do we hate our women?

I think it's time to kill for our women,

Time to heal our women,

Be real to our women.

And if we don't we'll have a race of babies,

That will hate the ladies, that make the babies.

And since a man can't make one,

He has no right to tell a woman when and where to create one.

So will the real men get up?

I know you're fed up ladies, but keep your head up.

Seventy-Three!

Düsseldorf

It made me miss my Moscow muttdom,

It made me miss my New York nothing. 

Everybody's Free (To Wear Sunscreen)

In June of 2008, what feels like a lifetime ago, I was graduating high school. A good friend of mine, in honour of the occasion, made me two mixed CD's called Songs of Encouragement Pt. I & II. In my foolish exuberance of feeling liberated and not at all concerned about needing encouragement, I gave them a listen, but nothing struck me as applicable to my situation.

When over a year later the novelty of being a new graduate, and a University freshman, had long worn off, the idea of encouragement was much more welcomed. I popped the discs back into the CD player of my Daewoo, and this is what I heard:

Wear sunscreen.

What I was hearing was director Baz Luhrmann's studio adaptation of an article written by Mary Schmich in The Chicago Tribune in 1997. Her article, which was set to the tune of Everybody's Free (To Feel Good) by Zimbabwean songstress Rozalla, outlines a series of common (and not-so-common) advice we should apply to ourselves in order to lead fulfilled and happy lives. Obviously if you know me, you are familiar with my set of beliefs, and that I believe there are much greater resources and relationships from which to derive happiness and fulfillment, however her article is relevant nonetheless. Besides, what can pick you up faster than sound advice in the form of a pop song.

Now, years later, I still listen to this track from time to time, whenever I need to be reminded to -- pause, reset -- get out of my comfort zone, continue challenging myself, re-establish my priorities in life, and just provide myself with a little re-orientation. Even still will I get the occasional tear in my eye at some of the more sentimental points in the verse (embarrassing!)

Just in case you are the one person on the planet who isn't familiar with this article-turned-pop song, I have included it below for you to also love and learn from.

Wear sunscreen.

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded. But trust me, in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine.

Don't worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blindside you at 4 p.m. on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing every day that scares you.

Sing.

Don't be reckless with other people's hearts. Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Floss.

Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long and, in the end, it's only with yourself.

Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements. Stretch.

Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don't.

Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees. You'll miss them when they're gone.

Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else's.

Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it or of what other people think of it. It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own. Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room.

Read the directions, even if you don't follow them.

Do not read beauty magazines. They will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents. You never know when they'll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings. They're your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard. Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.

Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths: Prices will rise. Politicians will philander. You, too, will get old. And when you do, you'll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund. Maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one might run out.

Don't mess too much with your hair or by the time you're 40 it will look 85.

Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen.

When I get out of sorts, I look at the calendar.

  




There's usually something significant on the horizon.